drive like crazy.

don't you hate when you see yourself going completely psycho on something for no reason but extreme jealousy. sure you trust yours, but you can't stand the audacity of this other person for even tempting to compromise that faith. maybe it's not such a bad thing?
...maybe that gut wrenching feeling of the thought of someone else with your mate is just that.. love. as much as I hate turning completely teen girl squad when I see stupid stuff on facebook or texts etc. I only hope that he feels that same erkk when a dude posts on my wall.

on sleeping with you.

we've been sleeping together a long time.
however, there are a few things I need to get off my chest.
don't get me wrong, I do love you.
I appreciate the kisses and all the attention,
even though it does get a little much.
the issue here is when you are sleeping...
you take up a lot of space
and let's be honest,  you are not that big.
when I try and move you, you growl and kick.
the smells and sounds that exit your body are horrifying.
it's embarrassing, what if my roommates assume it's me?
you're jealous and lash out when anyone else comes near.
you're in and out all night.
I don't know where you are or who you are with.
my bed is my sanctuary, not a flop pad for your convenience.
and it especially hurts when I try and snuggle closer to you
and you get up and leave.
you would rather sleep on the couch than be touching me.
I know you'll never read this, you think blogs are stupid...
but just know, I think it's time we revisit getting you your own dog bed.

the voyeur.

why do men love strip clubs? fetishes for big, fake boobs, therapy and more.. check out this blog if you are interested (like you are not).

humbug.

broke? join the club. here is an excellent article about giving without spending. less stress, less wrinkles... better boddies. who doesn't want a better body?!

more wool.

thumb sketch.

I'm fine.

and we rely on eachother.

tender love is blind, it requires a dedication
all this love we feel needs no conversation
we ride together, ah ha
from one love to another ah ha

bee gees

happy christmas.

It' has been a year since last. I guess that never changes. christmas has a way of making you think of the years before. maybe it's the nostalgia. maybe it's the new chill in the air and moments of reflection when your breath turns to smoke. a year older, a year wiser. more tears, more laughs, more wrinkles. better clarity, yet still the same problems. better friends, new and old. with each broken heart, each magic kiss, you are closer to realizing and experiencing true love.

I am no more together in my life then a year earlier, but I am happier and I have those in my life to thank.

my friends, for being so fucking funny. I realize that seems like a rediculous sentiment to be the most thankful for, but I am. I have the funniest friends in the world and my ability to not take my life so seriously I can conclude to how often I pee my pants laughing at my friends.

my family, I spent many years blaming 'les miserables' that is the production of my christmas holiday on my family. but instead of thinking about how I get zero items from my list on christmas morning or the depressing awkwardness of divorced parents on special occasions. if I think about how weeks earlier they bailed me out of being homeless (or cell phone less) for the ump teenth time, and how much support they give me and how I really couldn't function without them. to think of how my dad spent years telling my sister and I how santa would be sick of milk and cookies and would much prefer beer and stinky cheese by the time he got to our house. or my mom's insistence in getting my sister and I new pajamas for christmas eve. even though we haven't worn pajamas since we were ten and not to mention it is a miracle if either of us manage to get home to pass out christmas eve, never mind change into sweat pants ... all for the sake of tradition. because even though, to me christmas sucks, if I didn't have my sister to roll my eyes at with... I'd fake mono every year.

my dog, for looking up at me with those eyes. she pees herself every time I walk in the door. she is so stoked EVERY morning just because I get out of bed.

just, because it's all you. at the end of the day if things aren't right with you, I am not happy. you make me happy. those messages, those smiles, hearing you just call me your girlfriend is better than any christmas present I've ever known.

so as hard as I tried to fight it, winter is here. christmas is coming. and while I could be richer, could be smarter, could be thinner... could have a inkling of what I plan on doing with my life, I am thankful.
so merry christmas.

you filthy animals.

miss piggy: sex icon.

an amazing gallery of miss piggy working it.

I'm fine.

...lanieka on the other hand.

sunday secrets.

I thought this was a really interesting sunday secret. I think there is only so many times friends can go over the same issue before one finally stops caring. you can only help people who want to help themselves. I have so much respect for those who talk to professionals. It's like admitting to yourself, you're worth it.