sexting etiquette from 1922

remember that every word of writing is immutable evidence for or against you, and words which are thoughtlessly put on paper may exist a hundred years hence. Always keep in mind and never for one instant forget that a third person, and that the very one you would most object to, may find and read the letter.
Emily Post Ettiquette, 1922

my cell phone is my life... no really.

at dinner the other night I was checking my phone and my dad goes "do you know how rude that is?" and I thought and replied "No, not really". At this specific setting, eating dinner (in front of the tv mind you) with my dad- I did not feel it rude to check my messages. The eight hour work day simply does not exist to most people in the  modern work force. most meetings occur out of the work day and the key to success is communication. therefore it seems completely appropriate that my cell phone be with me at this casual dinner. 
Peter Gruber explains in the intimacy of the cell phone, "This instrument, a mobile phone, was kept close to my heart, viewed inches my eyes, and pressed next to my ear. Name something more intimate! It transmitted my aspirations, hopes and dreams. It fed back to me my wins and losses. It captured my most powerful moments"
"This isn't the end of that process. Change will come faster bringing more intimacy. All of your medical information will be on your mobile phone including monitoring your physical health. The Benjamins are going to disappear from your wallet and appear on your phone making it look increasingly like an electronic MBNA card. So it's now an instrument of success and survival - two primal pulls and pushes of our lives. Name something in your life that interests you more than your success and your survival?"


...both of these quotations are magnificent explanations for the next person that rolls their eyes at you when you check your bbm.

smart phone etiquette.

an extremely popular topic of debate is the use of smart phones over meals. there is nothing worse than wanting to have an important conversation with someone who is busy updating their twitter status. an easy solution is agree at the beginning of the meal (with a friend) the degree of casualness it will be, a phone glancing meal or a ringer off one. In general, any kind of first impression (date) or meal with those of older generations (who are not used to being attached to these devices) it is better to check your messages on a bathroom break. a great issue brought up in the ny times is should google be allowed at dinner?  "What if a few clicks of the smartphone can answer a question, solve a dispute or elucidate that thoughtful point you were making? What if that PDA is not being used to escape a conversation but to enhance it?" interesting.

subway etiquette.

this was a long time coming. I firmly believe in not using a blog as a bitchfest but public transportation has become such an often and awful part of my daily existence I feel the need to make a few comments...

1.  do not eat on the subway. little snacks sure. I can’t eat while watching intervention/hoarders/dexter etc. and I consider the subway to be filled with real life characters of those programs.

2.  I will always give up my seat for seniors. But dear women- approximately late forties, early fifties ish just be happy you don’t look like a senior. Do not look at me with those judging eyes and think 'oh must be nice not to have grey roots,  no bags under your eyes and a tight little body'. I work just as hard as you and it is not my fault you're stuck with the walking dead twenty years later.

3. It is okay to laugh at a good nut, I’m not talking about some unfortunate case that suffers or has clearly been drinking mouth wash. But some one who puts on a good show, have a good chuckle. Recognize them as human, they are performing whatever song or prophecy for a reaction, and who couldn’t use a smile on the subway. 

4.  Guys picking up girls on the subway, don’t. That’s it, just don’t. The only thing we are thinking about on the subway is why the @#$! isn’t my boyfriend driving me, or I really need a dude with a car.

5. To the woman that hissed at me last week and moved to the opposite side of the car. WHAT!?  I was braiding my hair… gawd.

...more to come I am sure, would love your own comments and additions.

modern day etiquette.

TEN GENTLE REMINDERS

1. making others feel at ease is the essence of etiquette, yesterday and today.

2. there are few words more elementary or more welcomed than please or thank you.

3. good moods are contagious. Hopefully yours will be pleasantly catching.

4. be aware and considerate of [personal space]- physical, visual and aural.

5. showing respect is a gift, one that costs nothing and is endlessly appreciated.

6. think of your tone of voice as a telegraph. To the listener it speaks volumes

7. a short fuse does nothing but burn. Should you find yourself with one, steer clear of others.

8. never underestimate the message that’s sent by your poise and posture.

9. clothes count. Appropriate attire is not only respectful, it’ refreshing.

10. let common sense be your guide and graciousness your goal.

courtesy of manners- kate spade

image credit: flickr rosewithoutathorn84