inked.

craving more ink. craving something really badass too...

not getting in the car.

we never give thanks to those not willing to drag us into hell. by not dating you, not screwing with you, not giving you false hope. maybe those are the ones who actually care about you?

stumped.

doing me.

'doing me' is probably the most selfish thing one can do. it makes complete sense at this age to get to know yourself and push yourself to find the real you. find out what you want, who you want, and how you are going to get it. but maybe our generation doesn't have it as figured out as we think. maybe we have masked selfishness as self discovery. what if we don't like who we are as a free agent? maybe we need that other person to consider, to consult and to care for. somebody to keep you at home or get angry when you drink too much. someone to care when you dress like a floozy or eat cereal for dinner. where is the balance?

to feel like you're not in the room until he looks at you.

I bet you've had a hard time walking into a room full of people on your own, right? Yeah. I know that. I know what it is not to feel like your in the room until he looks at you or touches your hand or even makes a joke at your expense, just to let everyone know... you're with him. You're his. 

becky pie hands.

In honor of becky pie hands visiting this weekend here is a lovely video featuring her cuteypie head. she is forever an inspiration. read her blog... wives of hell daughters of earth. you'll die.

One Night Nostalgia from AJ Chavar on Vimeo.

weekend.

implicitly inspiration.

my writing hiatus has been a result of my lack of inspiration. So I've been thinking about what inspires me... reading, traveling, the beach and people. traveling and reading have both been plentiful, the beach is covered in a glacial blanket, leaving people. I have always been fascinated by those who inspire and fascinate. Whether it's that kid in your class with the eccentric notebook, the always put together fashionista or that friend that always has cool music to share. 'the interview' is another extremely raw medium that any writer craves. completely first hand information in the form of dialogue. SO what I have decided (and now that I have posted have got to follow through with...) is I will start adding to my posts "implicitly: (people who inspire)". I will construct a series of quiz like questions, short bio and a picture of people who inspire.
here is the organic part... these are people you or I know. I have to pick them or a reader has to nominate them. everyone likes reading about more tangible people and it's proven that amateur porn is searched WAY more than professional porn.. so lets keep it natural.
I can already think of so many I want to do, and I promise to be brave and message those girl crushes on facebook and those dudes I can't even talk to in real life. please help! send me questions you'd want answered and people you want nominated and give me feedback.

dudes with motorcycles.

you win.

tgif.

sorry for my hiatus. good things are coming. I promise.